The Signs of Flirting

Learn to Recognize the Signs of Flirting

Being able to pick up on the signs of flirting is an important part of the attraction process. It allows you to find out if your flirting skills are working, and also lets you know if it’s time to get more intimate.
That said, I have to admit that I have a real love hate relationship with learning the signs of flirting.
The reason for this is because when you’re constantly on the lookout for flirting sings, you end up putting yourself in a very reactive state of mind. In other words, you focus less on having fun and enjoying the interaction, and more on trying to tell if the other person is into you.
The Problem with Always Being on the Lookout
I sometimes do one on one consultations with people who are trying to improve their flirting skills. I’ll usually start off by giving them a bunch of theory on flirting techniques, and then take them out to practice flirting in the real world.
This combination of theory and practice really helps out a lot of these “students”. But every once and a while, I would have a student who had a hard time moving things forward with the person they were talking to.
Things would start off great, but they were so focused on looking for signs of flirting from the other person, that when they didn’t get them, they would get nervous and walk away feeling rejected.
The Right State of Mind
Nowadays, in addition to teaching students the specific signs of flirting, I also teach them one other crucial item. That is to remain unreactive. What do I mean by this?
Well simply put, it’s a way of not allowing your state of mind to be affected by the other person’s response to your advances. So…if they aren’t interested in flirting with you, you simply assume that it’s their problem. Maybe they had a rough day at work, or aren’t feeling well.
You don’t want to get into the habit of assuming that the reason someone doesn’t seem to be flirting back, is because it has something to do with you.
I know it’s important to have some sort of indicators to help you tell if someone is flirting with you. And in this section you’ll find a lot of specific things to look out for.
But at the same time I don’t want you to get too caught up on identifying the signs of flirting. In fact, what if instead of looking out for subtle things that let you know if someone is interested, you simply took every action as a sign of flirting.
Be a Little Delusional
Wouldn’t you feel a lot more calm and confident if you believed that the people you were interested in were just naturally interested in you as well? That’s the sort of set of belief that you need to have in order to really develop a flirtatious personality. In fact, most people find this type of attitude extremely charming.
Now, you’re probably thinking that you’d need to be pretty delusional in order to be going around thinking that everyone you were interested in, was flirting with you. Well, you’re kind of right. But hey, if being a little delusional is what it takes in order to land you a lot more dates, I say run with it.
So stop looking for signs that people are flirting with you….instead just assume that they already are!